Why Solo Travel Will Make You Your Own Best Friend
If you’ve been following along here for a while, you know that I always like to plan a few days of solo travel at the end of each of my retreats. These days offer a chance to decompress, reflect on the past week of hosting, and most importantly, reconnect with myself.
During these end-of-retreat trips, I love blending a bit of adventure with activities that nurture my body and spirit. What I've come to understand about solo travel is its unique ability to amplify our intuition—that quiet voice that can often be drowned out by the daily noise, especially when I’m leading a retreat.
But given that loneliness is, in fact, a pandemic for adults in the United States, let's talk about it for a sec. Here's what I've discovered about combating loneliness.
Travel has been a huge part of my process of becoming my own best friend, particularly over the past few years as I’ve navigated my new solo life. I genuinely believe that becoming your own best friend is the antidote to loneliness.
Before my divorce, solo time—and especially solo travel—was never a big priority for me. However, through my own experience and witnessing the experiences of many women my age, it’s clear that not enough of us cultivate time alone. This is precisely why the empty nest phase can be such a significant transition.
I'm truly grateful for the journey I've had getting to this place — having more comfort in solitude — but if I had to do it all over again, I would prioritize finding more time to explore on my own from the very beginning. That’s the advice I would give to any woman, whether in a relationship or not: make having a relationship with yourself a priority. My ideal scenario would include taking a trip with each of my kids one-on-one, a trip by myself, and a trip with my partner every year.
When you travel solo, you connect with different parts of yourself that often lie dormant in the hustle and bustle of daily life. Social media can make transitions like empty nesting even more challenging because everything feels so visible and comparably scrutinized. However, what I've discovered is that the antidote to loneliness is actually to embrace being alone. By strengthening that relationship with yourself, you become your own best company. Whether you have a home full of kids or are enjoying most days alone, this self-reliance is a true gift.
Loneliness is not about the absence of people but the absence of connection—with others and with ourselves. Solo travel and alone time allow us the space to forge a deeper bond with our own spirit, to listen to our needs, desires, and dreams without external distractions.
So, how do you tackle loneliness when you’re alone a lot?
How Not to Be Lonely When You Are, In Fact, Alone a Lot:
1. Embrace Solo Time
Don’t view being alone as a problem to be solved but rather an opportunity to explore. Schedule regular solo activities that soothe and excite you.
2. Cultivate Your Interests
Dive into hobbies and passions that are uniquely yours. Whether it’s hiking, painting, reading, traveling, or gardening, invest in activities that bring you joy.
3. Stay Connected
While solo time is important, so is human connection. Make an effort to reach out to friends and family, even if it’s just through a quick text or a phone call. And join Communities! Find or create groups that share your interests. Local meetups, hobby groups, and retreats are great places for this.
4. Explore New Places
Travel often. Explore new places, even if it’s just a nearby town you’ve never visited.
5. Be Kind to Yourself
Practice self-compassion. Understand that it's okay to feel lonely sometimes; it’s a natural part of the human experience and give yourself that same kindness you would offer a friend.
For me, the goal is not to banish loneliness but to transform it into a space for growth and self-love. These are the practices I've found to be most helpful.
